Pinch My Nipples!

Wondering about the title of this post? Let me explain. A while back I sent a joke about this woman wanting to exchange something at Wal-Mart and when the cashier refused the lady put her arms up and started to scream "Pinch my nipples, pinch my nipples!". The store manager came to see what the commotion was about the lady explained that she had bought something on sale and wanted to exchange it, to which the manager explained that they couldn't since it was purchased on sales. Again the lady threw her arms up and started to yell "Pinch my nipples, pinch my nipples!", which brought on a bigger crowd. The manager finally asked her why was she screaming to pinch her, to which the lady said "When I'm being screwed, I love to have my nipples pinched!"

Today I went for service on my car at a Honda dealership.... Need I say more?

Every single time I go for service on my car I feel like I'm about to get screwed... and I won't enjoy it! Walking in I felt like throwing my arms up and say "Pinch my nipples!"

This morning was the 48,000km service where they check a bunch of things (a "BIG service, little lady", like I was told by a stern looking man at the counter). I left my car with them, all day.

$352.40 later, the man behind the counter (a little more chatty) said I was a good driver since they didn't have to change my brakes. Approximately 70% of my brakes remained. Not bad for a 3 year old car! When he was going through the inspection check list, something "clicked" about my brakes... but since I was happy that my bill wasn't that bad I didn't say anything.

When I got home, the brakes' pourcentage was bugging me, so I looked for my previous service invoice (at the same dealership!), which was for my 32,000km inspection. (I had an oil change in between - well... not me, my car!) At the time, my front brakes were at 60% and my rear ones at 75%!

Damn I'm good! I'm such a good driver that I put metal back on my break pads!!! That's how good I am! But seriously! Who are we kidding? Granted I don't play music with my brakes - you know the type that brakes infront of you for no reason? Following them you can tell that they are listening to the same radio station you are, by the flashing of their brake lights - but to have a higher percentage? Somebody, somewhere screwed up...

It's no biggy, but it just proves that my feeling that I'm about to get screwed isn't that far off... and that maybe, next time I walk in there I WILL throw my arms up and scream:
"Pinch my nipples! Pinch my nipples!!!"