I'm one who believes in trying different things (to a certain extent). When traditional medicine sometime fell, alternative medicine may prevail. I’m open to suggestion if it will help me in the long run. The Chinese and their herbs and acupuncture have been at it way longer then we have, so I trust their knowledge. At times, maybe more than my regular doctor! He seems so close to anything else that it infuriates me.
My pain travelled through the years; sometimes it was my knee, my jaw, my neck, my side and my back. There’s always something hurting and I’m fed up of it. I want it to stop. For over 20 years I did abuse my body on an almost daily basis. Karate was rough. I got beat up and I know I did a number on my body.
First injury ever incurred because of sport was when I was 16. I broke both my wrists playing basketball. Following that my mother decided that I should give karate a try, since I was thinking of becoming a cop… I tried one class and got hooked.
During all my years of training I’ve been badly bruised more often than I care to remember, blue, green & yellow were common colours on me at the time. I sprained a few toes, fingers, and wrist, had a few black eyes, and only broke one toe – the big one of my right foot. I hit an elbow and the elbow won! It was a nasty fracture, broken at 3 places, but I kept training.
Since Hubby was playing badminton weekly, I joined the club. I really enjoyed it. It was different and my martial reflexes were very helpful on the court. I even decided to participate at tournaments. During one of those local tourney, as I was going for the shuttle when my shoe jammed and my body went one way and my knee the other. End result: thorn meniscus and ACL, but I did get that point! I had reconstructive surgery. Drilling into bone really hurts. During my rehab I saw a physio and an osteo.
Following that, I had lumps on my legs, that nobody could do anything about. They were painful and doctors were “trying” different things on me, but nothing really worked, except acupuncture. Those little needles took care of those lumps, and they never came back.
My neck & lower back were hurting me on a semi-regular basis, and nobody seemed to be able to find the cause of it all. Was it posture, was it due to karate, what? Traditional medicine wasn’t doing anything for me, except prescribe painkillers, which I didn’t really want to take, except when I couldn’t stand the pain any longer. I wanted to know the cause of this pain!
Two years ago the osteopath I was seeing didn’t want to treat me anymore because he felt that my body was fighting against his treatments. He suggested meditation, to learn to really relax and let go. So, I started that. I’ve been doing that for over two years, but the pain is still there. It varies in intensity but it never really goes away. I’m tired.
I’ve been seeing a Heller worker (deep tissue massages) for many years. It helps a lot, but there are areas where he just can’t go in because it hurts too much. We’ve been trying to break some habits I developed because of martial arts. It’s been hard. I got to a point where the pain was too much, so I stopped all sports. I felt that my body needed a break and maybe if I’d stop the pain would go as well. I’ve been stuck in this vicious circle of not training because of pain, and when I do try to get back into it, the pain stops me.
He’s the one that strongly suggested looking into sleep apnea. Some of my symptoms were pointing towards that direction. I had to convince my g.p. in order to get a referal to see a doctor for sleep disorder. Turns out that I do have sleep apnea…
I’ve had this pain on my right side, for quite a while now. Again, my Heller worker, over a year ago or so, asked me if he could discuss my case with an osteo he worked with. At this point, what did I have to lose? I got a little scared when she called me, late one evening, asking a bunch of questions and insisting that I should see my doctor and get some very specific tests. I saw her a few times for treatments, and she seemed to think there was something going on with my organs and my menstrual cycle, which was causing me this side pain.
After overcoming (yet again) the judgement of my very “traditional” g.p. I was sent for a series of tests. Turned out I did have something there: a fairly big cyst on my left ovary. No big deal, a lot of women do. But they would keep an eye on it. The last year I’ve been going for regular check-ups and ultra-sounds at about every three months. They (again!) tried a few things: “try this for a few months, and we’ll see you back in…” Nothing seemed to really affect that thing growing inside my belly, and the pain wasn’t going away either.On Monday I had an appointment for the results of my last ultra-sound. Within 5 minutes in the doctor’s office I was told that the next step was surgery. They would remove the cyst, the ovary and my uterus (as long as they’re in there). That should take care of it. Naturally they can not guarantee that my pain will go away, but it should…
Friday I talked with a yoga instructor (thinking about starting that, feel the need to stretch) and she suggested to try other options before having my insides cut out. What she said made sense to me, except that the “natural way” is a slow process… and yet again nothing is for sure. Let’s try this, or test that and let’s see what happens… I’m fed up! Can’t anybody understand that? Someone suggested getting a second opinion… ok, but how long will that take? It’s already been too long! I have pain here! I may not complain a lot about it, or show it, but I feel it, I live with it and I am really fed up! I’m done dealing with it.
I’m so fucking fed up of being probed, poked and tested. I want my pain to go away! That’s all! At times like these, I truly understand my father wanting out... Is it ok for me to not want to be tested anymore? I’m not worried about the fact that I won’t be able to ever have kids after the surgery. We weren’t planning any. If the “urge” ever comes, there’s always adoption. Going through the “change” now can be a different story, but there are hormones to take care of that. I'm not happy about being cut open - that's the part that I'm really not looking forward to, but I'm not the first nor will I be the last woman to go through this.
Surgery may not be the best solution, but… at this point it time, I’d say it’s starting to sound damn good…
11 comments:
Obviously, I can't answer the question in your title. You have to do what is right for you. I am lucky to know very little about chronic pain, but I hope that whatever you choose makes you feel more comfortable.
Why on earth do they want to take your uterus out? That seems really extreme. I know a few people who've had ovaries removed because of cysts, but I've never known one to have a hysterectomy for it. I don't know how that's supposed to help.
If you get one ovary removed and keep the other, you won't go through early menopause.
Oh, that sounds awful! I can't imagine being in pain for that many years. I think I'd definitely go for a second opinion before having a hysterectomy. That's major surgery and takes a bit of time to recover. I think you have to go on hormone therapy right after that, too, if they take everything (ovaries and uterus). Yuck.
I too have been fortunate enough not to have any kind of chronic ailment. I have to agree with hasarder, to say basically "we might as well take the whole thing out while we're in there" doesn't seem like the best option.
I have talked to women who had complete hysterectomies and they say it's the best thing they ever did and then others say it has been awful.
some help I am!
I like the whole holistic treatment approach. I really believe that God gave us everything we need in nature to sustain and heal us. I also believe that modern doctors are very swayed by prescription drug companies and don't always have our best interests at heart. Actually, I'm taking up way too much space here ~ I'm going to make a post about that on my blog.
Good luck with whatever you choose.
Good luck with whatever option you choose. Attitude is a huge part of it all, in my opinion. Pray about it (if you are a prayerful person) and make whatever decision you think is the best one for you.
Dang Stinky, this sounds a little like me lately. In the last year or so I've been feeling not so good, but with no answers. In my case I do believe hormones play a huge part. Have you tried a chiropractor? Mine did wonders for my neck and back (though I continue to have problems, ugh.) Good luck and keep us posted.
I have to admit that I had to stop reading after the part where you blew out your knee. I'm too much of an empath, and now my whole body hurts.
My advice: get as many opinions as you value, and then go with the ones you trust most. Wishing you much luck and pain-free days!
-r-: You are lucky not to "know" pain, enjoy it - it's not easy at times!
hasarder: They figured I've been having some problems with it, so while "opened" they might as well take care of that too (instead of going back in a few years, 'cause from whqat they said, they would...) I'm still thinking about it, and trying to make the right decision for me. I have about 1.5 month to decide...
ananke: I would have to take hormones after, but I'll deal with that in time, at the moment I just want to figure out if I should do it or not. After a day like today, trust me, I want that pain to stop!!!
pd: It is a 50-50 thing, that much I know. I'll be taking a gamble that my pain will go... at tleast that's what I'm hoping for!
I agree with you on the doctors being bought out by drugs cies, they don't give a rat's ass about any of their patients, so I have to do my research and decide.
3c: I agree, a lot of it has to do with how you see/feel about it.
pg: I did see a chiro in my teens, and didn't like the "rice crispies effect" (snap, crackle, pop!)...
Thank you all, ladies, for your support, I will consider many avenues before letting them cut me open, that's for sure! My brain is going over this non-stop and doing research, as well as Hubby... I'll keep you posted.
dcmm: Didn't mean to cause you pain! Thanks for the empathy and the suggestion!
I have lived with chronic pain for many years. The tests, the doctors, medicines and results vary greatly. I had a hysterectomy when I was 29 but they left my ovaries (cervical cancer/invading uterus). I have never regretted it. Early menopause didn't bother me. I took hormones for short period of time to get me through the worst of it, but now it's fine.
You have to make the final decision but I would get a few more opinions from physicians.
I hope you will feel better soon.
mimaw: Thanks for the input. I'm still debating about this. I've consulted many so far and I'm getting really fed up about it all! I feel that I'm getting as many options as I see doctors, they all have their "ideas", but NONE of them are certain, which is the part that gets to me!
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