Les gens rient, sifflent, crient, s'amusent. La musique écorche les oreilles. Mais quand on le reconnaît, les voix baissent les gens se calment. Le curé s'approche du bar et il demande au barman s'il peut utiliser les toilettes.
- Hum !! Ce n'est pas tellement une bonne idée, elles ne sont pas très recommandables pour un homme d'église.
- Et pourquoi ça ?
- Hé bien... dans les toilettes, il y a une statue d'une très, mais très belle femme, les seins nus, revêtue d'une seule feuille d'érable pour cacher son sexe. On ne voudrait pas vous offenser.
- Mais non, mais non. J'ai fait le voeu de chasteté et je ne regarde plus les femmes... C'est loin tout ça.
- Bon. Ok. Allez-y! C'est au fond, à gauche.
Lorsque le curé revient dans la salle. Ça hurle plus fort qu'à sont arrivé et ça chante "il est des nôtre..." plus fort que jamais. Les gars sont debout lorsqu'ils l'aperçoivent et on l'applaudit même. Jacky avec un grand sourire l'accueille au bar et lui offre un verre et Louise-Anne lui propose une danse à 10$ pour 5$.
Étonné et même choqué, le curé demande au barman ce qui se passe.
- Ben vous êtes l'un des nôtres maintenant. Voyez vous, losqu'on touche aux seins de la statue, les lumières au dessus du bar clignotent et chaque fois qu'on soulève la feuille d'érable, ce sont les lumières de la scène qui "flashent". Croyez-moi, on a eu un OSTIE spectacle de lumières.... Bienvenue Monsieur curé! Une bière?
***
Things to ponder in the year 2007:
Number 10 - Life is sexually transmitted.
Number 9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Number 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
Number 6 - Some people are like a Slinky ... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
Number 5 - Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
Number 4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200 and a substantial tax cut saves you 30 cents?
Number 2 - In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2007: We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration
Give me a sense of humor and Give me the grace to see a joke. So get some humor out of life, and pass it on to other folks!
No trees were killed in the posting of this message. However, a large number of electrons were terribly inconvenienced.
Have a great weekend!
Keep warm!
Keep warm!
14 comments:
I like the list for 2007.
Especially numbers 2 and 7...
You know, number 8 is....oddly accurate. ;-)
Number 7 made me guffaw [so ladylike, I am sure]...and number 6?
Made me think I need to change the Crazy Widow's monniker to "Slinky"....hee.....oh to only get close enough at the courthouse...
I kid, I kid....
Thanks again for yet another perfect laugh on a Friday...I can always count on you!
No. 8 is my fav. They are so simple, aren't they?
Awesome list! I had to crack up at the near truth and simplicity of myself. Sandwiches and Sex two powerful palliatives. I especially like the point about finding humor and seeing a joke. How True. wouldn't life be so much better if people could add humor to more of their issues!
I like # 7 too! Have fun tonight and ayez une bonne fin de semaine aussi!
horny and hungry, LOVE IT! LOL!
stay warm too, my feet are freakin freezing over here!
going to go make my guy a sandwich now.
m
Thank you just the 'tonic' I needed, (well a little gin to go with it might have been nice), I'm going to pour myself a small pickle juice and giggle. xx
This was very funny, even the comments cracked me up. Thanks !! Good start to the weekend...Mousse xoxoxo
My husband fell down the stairs once while I was walking behind him. For four years, I've lived with everyone accusing me of pushing him down the stairs. I think I'll use that Slinky theory on him. If I'm going to be blamed for something I didn't do, I might as well just do it. ;-)
Great list! #2 was awesome. Thanks for the much needed laugh!
j67: Figured you'd like the 60s one!
ananke: Yeah really!
skippymom: My pleasure - glad to read you back!
ctw: That's why we love them! ;-)
wreckless: Agreed - lots need a good sense of humor!
pg: Merci bien!
molly: Have fun!
st jude: Well deserved! Cheers!
mousse: Happy to bring a smile to your weekend!
dcmm: You got that right! Might as well "enjoy" it!
biddie: Anytime! ;-)
"Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich."
I laughed so hard that I woke up the dogs. That is NOT a good thing, because it's 4:30am. LOL
atm: What were you doing up at that time? You need to rest a little!
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