1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.
3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
5. You're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says: "How's my driving-call 1-800-".
6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space".
8. You can't believe they don't make a tampon bigger than Super Plus.
9. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.
***
Since we are "full blast" in an election campaign for a new (hopefully!) Québec Premier, I thought this one would be appropriate...
Five surgeons from big cities are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on.
The first surgeon, from New York , says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."
The second, from Chicago , responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded."
The third surgeon, from Dallas, says, "No, I really think librarians are the best, everything inside them is in alphabetical order."
The fourth surgeon, from Los Angeles chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers... those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over."
But the fifth surgeon, from Washington , DC shut them all up when he observed: "You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains and no spine, and the head and the ass are interchangeable."
Keep warm,
Have a great weekend
& don't forget to change your clocks on Sunday!
Have a great weekend
& don't forget to change your clocks on Sunday!
Image: Spring forward
10 comments:
cute funnies...
...turn the clocks ahead, right...grumble, grumble, grumble
I wonder if my boss is a politician...
Ayez une bonne fin de semaine!
Loved 'em! Happy Friday!!! :)
Wouldn't miss em ...
Ah, yes... I have all those estrogen issue symptoms this week. No wonder I feel like hell. ;-) Plus, I've noticed that my Farm Boy checks his calendar now before arguing with me. He wants to make sure he knows what he's getting into. haha
On your last post, you told a joke about what women menstruating found attractive. I mustered up the straightest face I could and told this to my lunch bunch pals. They thought it was hilarious. Thanks for giving us the smiles!
That described my behavior this week! It was a little eerie reading it! ;)
Crap.
I think that I have estrogen issues.
:(
But everyone IS scheming to drive me crazy. That's why their heads look like an invitation to batting practice. ;-)
kim: I know what you mean about the clocks - yuk!
pg: Why, can you interchange his head for his ass?
wordnerd: Welcome to my world! Every Friday, there's a "smile"!
100 words: Glad you like...
dcmm: That Farm Boy of yours is one smart cookie! :-D
wreckless: My pleasure! I'll try to keep them coming.
shopper: Eerie, indeed!
biddie: Who doesn't?!
ananke: Of course they are looking for you!!! I knew that!
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