Friday, February 08, 2008

Your Friday Smile!

An older man goes in for his yearly physical, with his wife tagging along.

When the doctor enters the examination room he says, "I will need a urine sample, a stool sample, and a sperm sample."

The old man, being hard of hearing, turns to his wife and asks, "What did he say?"

The wife yells back to him, "Give him your underwear!"


"Sixty is the worst age to be," said the 60-year-old man. "You always feel like you have to pee and most of the time you stand there and nothing comes out."

"Ah, that's nothin," said the 70-year-old. "When you're seventy, you don't have a bowel movement any more. You take laxatives, eat bran, sit on the toilet all day and nothin' comes out!"

"Actually," said the 80-year -old, "Eighty is the worst age of all."

"Do you have trouble peeing, too?" asked the 60-year old.

"No, I pee every morning at 6:00. I pee like a racehorse on a flat rock; no problem at all."

"So, do you have a problem with your bowel movement?"

"No, I have one every morning at 6:30."

Exasperated, the 60-year-old said, "You pee every morning at 6:00 and crap every morning at 6:30. So what's so bad about being 80?"

"I don't wake up until 7:00."

Have a great weekend!
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Marius said...

Pray allow me to be the first to say "EW...and EWWWWW!!!!"

Hillarious, of course, but icky.


Good morning, Ms. Paw.

lizgwiz said...

A very scatological Friday smile, to be sure. Disgusting. And yet...hee!

Ananke said...

Hahahahaha, reminds me of my first job as a nurse's aide in a nursing home. You know you have a glamorous job when you have to record the size of a resident's bowel movement. Blech!

Purple Pigeon said...

Hehehehe terrible, but classic!

Tammie said...

One of my very dearest lifelong friends had to take care of her elderly aunt until she died. The aunt spoke often about --um,-- output. Friend said to tell her if she ever started do the same. She has. Eeeewwwwww!