Thinking about this made me realise that I truly am getting older… I do see things differently. I remember when I would hear my parents complain about “today’s youth”. I’m at that age now I think. I’m sad to realise that but then again, I can’t seem to shake it off. I’m at a place in my life where I can see how the younger ones behind me are doing things and at times I can’t help to think “kids’ nowadays…”
My parents worked hard all their lives, and from a very young age incite me to do just that; work hard. They also showed me to have respect for others, to respect my elders, and take pride in whatever I did. I often feel people don’t have pride. They lack that little spark that will make then try a little harder. They do the minimum necessary and that’s that. I don’t want to generalize but at the same time it seems to be affecting a lot of younger people. They don’t want to take responsibilities, to be held accountable for anything and always have a valid excuse. I wonder if this is due to the fact that parents aren’t parenting like my parents did. I’ve lived first hand the effects of hitting a child, and I don’t think it’s the best way, but at times, a good smack on the bum does a child good. This I do believe. When I hear parents negotiating with their child it infuriates me. Come on people, it’s a kid who can’t formulate full sentences and you’re negotiating?! We went from one extreme (“what I say goes, and that’s that!”) to the other (“What would you prefer, please tell mommy?”). Kids need structure that much I know. I taught kids. They need discipline. With those two things they also learn respect. We now live in a big free for all, and nobody respect anything.
I can’t believe that a twenty plus years old person would still live at their parents’ house and expect their mom to do their laundry, prepare their meals, etc. Often, those same people tried living on their own and then came back to their parents because they couldn’t afford it. I just don’t get that. Don’t they have any pride? When I left my parents’ house I knew darn well that I would not be back. I would have been welcomed if I needed to, but my pride told me otherwise. I had rough times, but I stuck it out. I worked a little harder. I wanted to show my parents I could manage, and I did. I also think that parents have their roles in this lack of responsibilities thing. They allow their kids to come back and live in their home as if it was their own place. They feed them, and of course complain about it, but yet they tolerate a lot of things.
Granted I don’t have a child, so I do not know what it is to have one. But I can’t help and wonder does the fact that I didn’t give birth makes me less capable to think and see things for what they are? Or is that a function (you know, thinking using one’s judgement) that generally kicks in effect by giving birth?
How can one learn to be clean when there’s always someone behind scooping up the mess? How can one learn to fly, free, when only flying with a net? Sometimes one needs to crash, hard, to get back up and try again. Sometimes one will get help, but other times one has to figure things out on his/her own. Is that so hard? I don’t think so, since for ages we’ve been doing it and somehow it seemed to work… Look at where we are today. We’re not doing anyone a favour by “mothering” everyone the way we are today. If someone messes up, it should be ok to tell him/her, without being afraid of being sued or hurting his/her feelings. That “politically correctness” is bull. We’re now afraid to call things by their names because of this; it’s ridiculous. Everyone isn’t nice, perfect and good at what they do. And it’s ok to be faced with a refusal. No, Mom and Dad won’t always be there to fix things up or to get you out of that jam.
The one thing we should really teach our kids is that life is hard; we should all learn to deal with it!
OK feeling a little bit better now…