Friday, November 23, 2007

Your Friday Smile!

A sadist, a masochist, a murderer, a necrophile, a zoophile and a pyromaniac are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution, bored out of their minds.

"How about having sex with a cat?" asked the zoophile. "Let's have sex with the cat and then torture it," says the sadist.
"Let's have sex with the cat, torture it and then kill it," shouted the murderer. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it and then have sex with it again,"
said the necrophile.
"Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it,have sex with it again and then burn it," said the pyromaniac.

Silence took over... and the masochist says: "Meow."

***

A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs. Three women were walking past and felt sorry for the poor man. The first woman said "Have you ever had a hug?" The man said "No," so she gave him a hug and walked on.

The second woman said "Have you ever had a kiss?" The man said "No," so she gave him a kiss and walked on.

The third really beautiful woman came up to him and said "Have you ever been f*#ked?" The fellow said "No."

She said "You will be when the tide comes in. "


Happy weekend everyone!
Please let me know your birth date (here)

7 comments:

Parisukat said...

Canada is a nice country. I was just stating my personal preference. Sorry If I sounded negative but I've updated the entry. :) I guess there was a point in my life that I wish Canada didn't exist.. Coz the one I love migrated there. huhuhuhuhuh, But i definitely have nothing against Canada and Canadians.

Marius said...

The older I get the harder it is to find jokes that I've never heard, or that I can't predict the punch line to. You consistently achieve both. Kudos!! :-D

nicotine Jones said...

both very funny. Friday is definitely a regular stop for me here.

Stinkypaw said...

parisukat: No worries, really!

marius: Thank you gentle sire!

nicotine: Glad you enjoy that!

Nascar and the Canadian Curmudgeon said...

Ok my sides are hurting from laughing.....:):):)..I just tagged you come on over to observations from the back 40 if you want to participate...:)

Ananke said...

I loved both of those! :-D

Stinkypaw said...

nascar: Glad you liked those. I'll check it out, thanks!

ananke: My pleasure is your laughter! ;-)