For some reason, it does ring true...
***
Twas The Month After Christmas
Twas the month after Christmas,
and all through the house,
Nothing would fit me,
not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled,
the chocolate I'd taste
At the holiday parties
had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales
there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store
(less a walk than a lumber),
I'd remember the marvellous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt...
I said to myself, as I only can,
"You can't spend a winter, disguised as a man!"
So, away with the last of the sour cream dip.
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie, not even a lick.
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie.
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore...
But isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all, and to all a good diet.
Thanks Mousse, for both of these!
Have a good one everybody!
Keep warm!
Keep warm!
7 comments:
I think that sign is pretty funny! Thanks for the smile and I wish you a wonderful and beautiful day! :)
Stay warm!
BTW, I got the greatest calendar....from a 'kitty in Canada'(lol)! It sits beside me on my desk and I look at it a lot! Great pictures!:)
It is awesome and touched my heart! My heart is full and I am still smiling! Thank you so much for your thoughtfulness!
You made my day!
:)
ha..ha.ha.. NICE! I think I met that guy on Plenty of Fish instead. :)
Ditto that, PinkPiddyPaws! Hee.
That eHarmony sign is priceless!
Loved the poem too but, thanks to a bug I picked up from a customer, I'm already at my pre-holiday weight! (rolling my eyes)
Thanks for the Friday smiles. I hope everything's going good with you!! Have a great weekend!!
Hugs!!
it's 45 degrees here! woohooooo! take THAT east side of the continent!
OMG that was hilarious...good ole' e-harmony.
That is funny!
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