Your Friday Smile!

Three women: one engaged, one married, and one a mistress, are chatting about their relationships and decide to amaze their men....that night all three will wear a leather bodice S&M style, stilettos and mask over their eyes.

After a few days they meet again. The engaged girlfriend said: 'The other night, when my boyfriend came back home, he found me in the leather bodice, 4” stilettos and mask. He said, 'You are the woman of my life, I love you...then we made love all night long.'

The mistress stated: 'Oh Yes! The other night we met in the office. I was wearing the leather bodice, mega stilettos, mask over my eyes and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat, he didn't say a word. We just had wild sex all night.'

The married one then said: 'The other night I sent the kids to stay at my mother’s for the night, I got myself ready, leather bodice, super stilettos and mask over my eyes. My husband came in from work, grabbed the TV controller and a beer, and said, 'Hey Batman, what's for dinner?'

***

A blonde and a brunette were taking the elevator to the lobby from the 25th floor.

On the 23rd floor a very handsome man with great hair, but obvious dandruff, gets into the elevator. The women exchange a look acknowledging just how good looking this man is.

The man gets off the elevator on the 12th floor. The women watch him exit the elevator.

Then the brunette turns to the blonde and says, 'God, was he good looking, but someone ought to give him some Head & Shoulders.'

To which the blonde replies, 'How do you give shoulders?'

On that note, have a great weekend!
If you haven't yet, please tell me your birth date!

After a short trip to the States...

... Michelangelo's "David" returns to Italy . . .

Who knew? Not me!

First, I want to thank Just a grail for giving me the "Nice Matters Award". I don't really think she reads my blog, but hey, I'll take it! She sent it my way "because I know nice matters and I live it!"... Imagine that!

Second, I want to thank you dear regular readers, lurkers and passers by for all your visits. With your help I've managed to rack up over 25,110 visitors! Thank you so much!

Third, here's my actual post for today:

During the day, if working from home, I will log on to MSN and, at times, chat with people here and there. I mostly use it with Hubby. We use the computer instead of calling each other; a quick line and it’s done. If I didn’t have the time during the day, I will try, before going to bed to catch up on a few blogs and check my friends’ status update on Kaceboof. It’s almost a routine of mine. A few nights ago I’ve done something I had not done yet. What, you may ask? Stay up until almost 4am, because I was chatting…

I logged on to Kaceboof quickly and was about to log off when I heard a ding. Kaceboof now offers the possibility to chat while logged on. It was a “friend” (more an acquaintance) from Toronto, I. I’ve known him for over sixteen years. We’ve met through karate. He and his friend Z. had to come to Montreal for their black belt tests, which were being held at our dojo (training hall), and since they didn’t speak French I was assigned to be their translator for the weekend.

Nobody knew of these guys, except that they were Polish and didn’t speak French. I didn’t mind because when I saw them I thought they were quite hot. I was about 24 at the time, single and enjoying life! So I spent the whole Saturday with them, translating right and left, explaining, etc. I also had to fight with them. These guys were fit, lean, fighting machines; they impressed everyone with their skills. The both passed their shodan (black belt) and attended the party afterwards, with me in tow. It was a fun evening and, like every events of the kind, said we would keep in touch. And we did. At least Z. and I did.

I would see I., on occasion, at tournaments, in town or out of town like in New York, Vancouver. We always spoke, but nothing more. I was a lot closer with Z. The year before I met Hubby I had considered moving to Toronto, that’s how close we were… but didn’t.

My being on Kaceboof is fairly recent. I did refuse many requests before finally accepting one. The novelty wore off quite rapidly. Imagine my surprise when I. sent me a message asking what I was still doing up at 12:30 (usual bedtime). We exchanged the usual formalities and then chatted about the rough patch he’s been going through following his recent divorce. Through our exchanges it was mention of how long we’ve known each other, and how hot I was back then. I was surprised by that comment. When he wrote that he had the "hots" for me and would fight with Z. about me, I couldn’t believe it. I always thought he was more interested in the karate. He confessed that he would use karate to contact me, because he was too shy. He also realised that I was more interested in Z. so he backed down. It was nice catching up with him like that, and let’s just say that I’m happy I didn’t have a web cam. He would have seen how red I was. But I must say, it felt good to read. It was quite the ego boost, I must say...

It reminded me of Simplypink’s recent post about seeing an old flame and hiding being a rack… I’ve done that as well, but there is something about encountering an ex, or secret love, that brings back a flood of emotions, memories and even butterflies. It’s a good feeling and going to bed at 4 am was worth it to learn what I did that night, even if I felt like crap the next day…Hee.

Did Phillip Fart?

The expressions are priceless! Look at the Queen's face

What do you think?

Your Friday Smile!

John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change. One day John came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector.

It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 11 year old son, returned home from school over 2 hours late.

'Why are you so late getting home?' asked John.
'Several of us went to the library to work on a project,' said Tommy.

The robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy, knocking him completely out of his chair.

'Son,' said John, 'this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you really were after school.'
'We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie.' said Tommy.
'What did you watch?' asked Marsha.
'The Ten Commandments.' answered Tommy.

The robot went around and slapped him, knocking him off his chair again.

With his lip quivering, Tommy got up, sat down and said, 'I am sorry I lied. We really watched a tape called Sex Queen.'
'I am ashamed of you son,' said John. 'When I was your age, I never lied to my parents.'

The robot then walked around to John and delivered a resounding whack!

Marsha doubled over laughing; almost in tears and said, 'Boy, did you ever ask for that one! You can't be too mad with Tommy. After all, he is your son!'

With that the robot immediately walked around to Marsha and knocked her out of her chair.

***
Paddy's pregnant sister was in a terrible car accident and went into a deep coma. After being in the coma for nearly six months, she wakes up and sees that she is no longer pregnant. Frantically, she asks the doctor about her baby.

The doctor replies, "Ma'am, you had twins.... a boy and a girl. The babies are fine, however, they were poorly at birth and had to be christened immediately so your brother Paddy came in and named them."

The woman thinks to herself, "Oh suffering Jesus, no, not me brother, he's a clueless idiot" ... Expecting the worst, she asks the doctor, "well, what's my daughter's name?"

"Denise" says the doctor.

The new mother is somewhat relieved, "Wow, that's a really beautiful name. I guess I was wrong about my brother", she thought... "I really like Denise". Then she asks,
"What's the boy's name?"

The doctor replies " Denephew "

Have a great weekend everyone!
Happy Memorial Day (off!) to my American friends!
Let's not forget the birthday, please!

Mosquito Spray: Worth a try... Maybe not!

I've received this email at least four times, both in French and in English, so I've decided to share this piece of information with you. I have no clue if it's true or not, but I'm pretty sure I will try it...

I was at a deck party awhile back, and the bugs were having a ball biting everyone. Everybody was trying to squash or chase away those evil pests that were trying to stick their nose into our flesh in order to suck as much blood as possible... while creating this unpleasing sensation of being... eaten alive.

A man at the party sprayed the lawn and deck floor with something and the little demons disappeared.

The next year I filled a 4-ounce spray bottle and used it around my seat whenever I saw mosquitoes. And voila! It worked at a picnic where we sprayed the area around the food table, the children's swing area, and the standing water nearby. During the summer, I don't leave home without it... It being Listerine!

OUR FRIEND'S COMMENTS: I tried this on my deck and around all of my doors. It works - in fact, it killed them instantly. I bought my bottle from Target and it cost me $1.89. It really doesn't take much, and it is a big bottle, too; so it is not as expensive to use as the can of Bug-spray you buy that doesn't last 30 minutes.

So, try this, please. It will last a couple of days. Don't spray directly on a wood
door (like your front door), but spray around the frame. Spray around the window frames, and even inside the dog house.

Now you try it!

I even learned, last night, that rubbing a Bounce sheet on yourself helps to keep them away as well. That too, is worth a try. At least it smells good and who among us doesn't have a sheet or two of Bounce (or any other kind) to stuff in our pocket when we're outside?

Now, that's the kind of mosquito I want to see!

Our future? Really?

I grew up in town; downtown Montréal, in Little Burgundy, to be exact. It was rough and tough, no doubt about that. Despite it all, my parents kept a tight leash on me. By the time I moved out a lot of drug dealers had taken over the territory. The neighbourhood changed, like the rest of us I guess.

I then moved to LaSalle. It was fairly quiet. From there I moved to Verdun, also in a fairly quiet area. Then from there I moved to the suburbs, to Pierrefonds, in the West-Island of Montréal. Despite what we might think, it wasn’t all peaceful and such. The street where we lived had on one-side houses and town houses and on the other side apartment buildings. We lived on a corner. Often, people would cut across our yard. If either Hubby or myself were out we would ask them to not walk across. It worked most of the time, but not always. We had to file a complaint with the police because of a few kids who had thrown an empty bottle of vodka, taken from a recycling bin, against the side of our house. That time Hubby went out and followed the kids until he caught up to them and gave them crap. Long story short, the next morning we were awaken by two fathers and a kid, saying that they had heard that there had been a problem. Hubby explained what had happened, the kid apologized and that was the end of it.

When we moved back in town, I thought we might have issues with some homeless guys, since we are not that far for two local shelters for homeless. Turns out I was wrong. There are, across the street from us, apartment buildings. We only found out this winter that they are for low-income families. Since we moved here, we did notice some rambunctious kids, playing hockey in the street and slowly moving out of the way when a car was coming. Those kids had an attitude, and it was not their problem, that’s for sure.

A few weeks ago, as we came home, Hubby noticed that the kids, who were playing hockey, again, in the middle of the street, right in front of our place, were resting against his car, so he went out and told the kid not to lean against his car. At first one of the kids didn’t really move, so Hubby told him abruptly to get the f*uck off his car, so the kid turned around and said “No need to swear”. I was inside, cracking up. The kid was right, but his demeanour was just too cocky. He eventually, very slowly, got off the car. After what Hubby moved it to another street. Last week, I asked a bunch of them to go somewhere else because they were refilling their water bottles at the faucet in front of our basement window. Every time they opened the faucet the earth from the flowerbed splashed up in the windows. They moved, but with such attitude and so slowly to show me that “they” were moving because they wanted to. Those boys are between 8 to 12 years old. Last night they were sitting in our steps, feet covered in mud, which they were scrapping off their shoes onto the steps. Hubby went out and told them to go elsewhere. One of them got up, really slowly, and went down the steps. They were standing on the sidewalk, mouthing crap our way. Hubby came back in. A few minutes later we heard noise on the side of the house, so Hubby went through the garage to see the kids playing in the driveway. So again he told them to go play somewhere else. One of the kids had the balls to say that he lived there, which isn’t the case, so he could play there. I could see that their cockiness was building so I decided to call the cops. I asked to be transferred to the station, since it wasn’t an emergency but we were dealing with a mini street gang that could cause some trouble. By that time, one of the kids threw a rock in our window. Thankfully it didn’t break. I called the cops again, adding to the report, that it was building up. By the time the cops showed (of course!) another kid had thrown a can to our windows, again at the same time Hubby was opening the door. The kid saw him and scattered really fast. Those kids are like roaches when you flick on the light, they disappear!

After chatting with the police officers, who couldn’t do anything because the kids were long gone, they suggested to Hubby to keep calling them when we will see them back in the area. The live across the street!!! We should not hail them because we don't want to become their "target". I think that's advice is a little too late. I couldn’t help to think of those kids, in the West-Island who were a bit older than 13 years old, who decided to break in a house, killed the elderly couple using a baseball bat and stole their car for the “kick” of it! Or that movie I’ve seen, based on a true story that happened in England (can't remember the title of it for the life of me!) about kids who would terrorise people and then killed them for the fun of it. The youngest in that story was like 7 years old!

I don’t know about you, but when I was a kid, whenever an adult would address me I would listen. Just thinking that they could complain to my parents, scared the living day light out of me, because I knew there would be a price to pay. Today’s kids have not idea what discipline is and even less when it comes to respect. I never even thought of playing on a neighbour’s lawn. I would sit on their steps only if a friend of mine lived there and if I was there with her. I knew what was ours and what wasn’t. I guess I knew what respecting others meant. I only knew what fear was.

It saddens me to see this. That’s our future… now that’s one scary thought, isn’t it?

International Day Against Homophobia

Homosexuality isn’t a sickness! Today is the international day against homophobia.

Despite the World Health Organisation’s crossing homosexuality off as a mental sickness on May 17, 1991, many prejudices are still present when it comes to gays, lesbians and transgender.

Many people still think that being gay is a choice or a mental disorder, and some even think that it can be “cured”. Specialists in metal health think it is impossible. Granted that it’s only in 1973 that the American Psychiatry Association removed homosexuality from its reference book, and that decision was only reflected in their manuals published in 1980. No wonder there is still lots of work to do in public awareness.

I’m using my blog to fight ignorance against homophobia.

You can check out the official site for this International Day, here.

Your Friday Smile!

A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of
his eye. It reads: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 10 MILES.

He thinks this is a figment of his imagination and drives on without second thought....
Soon he sees another sign which reads: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 5 MILES. Suddenly he begins to realize that these signs are for real and drives past a third sign saying: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION NEXT RIGHT.

His curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive. On the far side of the parking lot is a stone building with a small sign next to the door reading: SISTERS O F ST. FRANCIS.
He climbs the steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a nun in a long black habit who
asks, 'What may we do for you ! my son? ' He answers, 'I saw your signs along the highway and was interested in possibly doing business....' 'Very well my son. Please follow me.'

He is led through many winding passages and is soon quite disoriented. The nun stops at a closed door and tells the man, 'Please knock on this door.' He does so and another nun in a long habit, holding a tin cup answers the door... This nun instructs, 'Please place $100 in the cup then go through the large wooden door at the end of the hallway.'
He puts $100 in the cup, eagerly trots down the hall and slips through the door pulling it shut behind him. The door locks, and he finds himself back in the parking lot facing another sign: GO IN PEACE. YOU HAVE JUST BEEN SCREWED BY THE SISTERS OF ST.FRANCIS. SERVES YOU RIGHT, YOU SINNER .

***

A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. Playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he looked up and said, "Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend now that Grandpa went to heaven?"

Grandma replied, "Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit in my bedroom and watch it all day long. The religious programs make me feel good and the comedies make me laugh. I'm happy with my TV as my boyfriend."

Grandma turned on the TV, and the reception was terrible. She started adjusting the knobs, trying to get the picture in focus. Frustrated, she started hitting the backside of the TV hoping to fix the problem.

The little boy heard the doorbell ring, so he hurried to open the door and there stood Grandma's minister. The minister said, "Hello son, is your Grandma home?"

The little boy replied, "Yeah, she's in the bedroom bangin' her boyfriend."

The minister fainted.

Now, that's funny... I don't care WHO you are!

Happy long weekend to all Canadians!
Please tell me your birthdate, if you haven't yet.

My 500th post! Woohoo!

This is the forth post I’m writing and deleting… I feel like I want to blog and then my ideas are so all over the place that I can’t keep track of my topic. I guess I’m in serious venting need. Not that there’s a lot going on, things did calm down and seem to be back to my normal pace. My head is good – still headache free – knock on wood. My neck is another story, but at least I’m not having migraines.

I’ve been doing my rounds in Blogsville, not as regular as I used to be, but I’m still there and leave comments. Ever notice how some people, no matter what is thrown their way, just get back up and deal? I admire that type. I’m not talking about the “sick” kind who say things like “When life throws you lemons, you learn to make lemonade”, nah, not those, I’m talking about the good folks.

My father (bless his sorry ass) was the type who would see everything in a negative light. So I grew up expecting the worst. Somehow, I did manage to become optimistic and yet realist as well. I don’t think the world is all pretty and pink, nor that people are all good. I’m not like Hubby either. Despite his good nature, he tends to be a little the son of his mother and be one who sees the bad in most things/people. Granted, often he’s right. People are morons, most people anyway. I’ll give him that. Maybe it is the people we deal with, I don’t know. But often I think: “The gene pool is in serious need of chlorine!”

I don’t like things to be complicated. I live by the K.I.S.S. rule (Keep It Simple Stupid), or at least I try to. Some seem to want everything but simple. They must make everything complicated. They can’t only mess up their things, nope, they have to share their misery (I guess it’s true misery loves company) and get me tangled in their complication universe. Thinking seems to be optional for a lot of folks out there. Here are some fine examples of this:

Exhibit A: The guys above our place, didn’t they know before moving in to a second floor condo, that smoke goes up? So, if I’m using my BBQ yes the smoke of it will make its way up to you… funny how that is.

Exhibit B: People whom willingly sign up for a fundraising event, didn’t they know they had to raise money? WTF? So, if you’re “not comfortable soliciting people”, then why did you join a fundraiser? Please don't do things to "help me", do it because you want to!

I don’t get this. Maybe it’s all me? Maybe I’m just turning an old grumpy bitch? But with fine examples like these I can’t help to think that maybe Hubby is right, people are morons. Urgh.

Nostalgia

I got an email over the weekend which brought on a bunch of memories...
I'm sure if you were a little girl in the 70's you'll remember some of these.

You had that Fisher Price Doctor's Kit with a stethoscope that actually worked.

You owned a bicycle with a banana seat and a plastic basket with flowers on it.
(and streamers on the handles! My bike was midnight blue with metal flakes. It was sooo cool!)

You learned to skate with actual skates (not roller blades) that had metal wheels.
(and let's not forget the key that came with them to adjust the lenght, remember those?)

You thought Gopher from Love Boat was cute (admit it!)

You had nightmares after watching Fantasy Island.

You had either a 'bowl cut' or 'pixie', not to mention the 'Dorothy Hamill'.
People sometimes thought you were a boy.

You had rubber boots for rainy days and Moon boots for snowy days.

You owned a 'Slip-n-Slide', on which you injured yourself on a sprinkler head more than once.

You owned 'Klick-Klacks' and smacked yourself in the face more than once!
(and let's not forget the bruises on the forearm!)

Your Holly Hobbie sleeping bag was your most prized possession.
(didn't have a sleeping bag, but had lots of other things!)

You wore a poncho, gauchos, and knickers.







You spent hours in your backyard on your metal swing set with the trapeze.
The swing set tipped over at least once.

You had a pair of Doctor Scholl's sandals (the ones with hard sole & the buckle).

You wanted to be Laura Ingalls Wilder really bad; you wore that Little House on the Prairie-inspired plaid, ruffle shirt with the high neck in at least one school picture; and you despised Nellie Oleson!

You wanted your first kiss to be at a roller rink! ---- yes it was!
(and "Funkytown" was playing!!)

Your hairstyle was described as having 'wings' or 'feathers' and you kept it 'pretty' with the comb you kept in your back pocket.
When you walked, the 'wings' flapped up and down, looked like you were gonna 'take off' .

You and your girlfriends would fight over which of the Dukes of Hazzard was your boyfriend.
(Bo was "it" for me!)

You had Star Wars action figures, too!
(and Luke was "it" as well!)

You often asked your Magic-8 ball the question: 'Who will I marry. Shaun Cassidy, Leif Garrett, or David Cassidy?'

You completely wore out your Grease, Saturday Night Fever, and Fame soundtrack record album.

You tried to do lots of arts and crafts, like yarn and Popsicle-stick God's eyes, decoupage, or those weird potholders made on a plastic loom.

You made Shrinky-Dinks and put iron-on kittens on your t-shirts!

You used to tape record songs off the radio by holding your portable tape player up to the speaker.
(This is how I learned English, recording songs and trying to write the lyrics and then translating them to French to "understand" them!)

You thought Olivia Newton John's song 'Physical' was about aerobics. (I'ts not??)

You wanted to be a Solid Gold dancer.

You glopped your lips in Strawberry Roll-on lip-gloss till it almost dripped off.

How about you? Did any of these bring back memories?

Your Friday Smile!

I hope not to offend anyone, but I thought these were cute...

An Ukrainian man wants a job, but the foreman won't hire him until he passes a little math test.

"Here's your first question," the foreman said.
"Without using numbers, represent the number 9."
"Without numbers?" the Ukrainian says, "Dat is easy."
And he proceeds to draw three trees.
"What's this?" the boss asks.
"Ave you got no brain? Tree and tree and tree make nine," says the Ukrainian.
( I thought he was Ukrainian, not French... oh well...moving right along...)

"Fair enough," says the boss. "Here's your second question. Use the same rules,
but this time the number is 99."

The Ukrainian stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture that he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree "Ere you go."

The boss scratches his head and says, "How on earth do you get that to represent 99?"

"Each of da trees is dirty now. So, it's dirty tree, and dirty tree, and dirty tree. Dat is 99."

The boss is getting worried that he's going to actually have to hire this Ukrainian,
so he says, "All right, last question. Same rules again, but represent the number 100."

The Ukrainian stares into space some more, then he picks up the picture again and makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, "Ere you go. One hundred."

The boss looks at the attempt. "You must be nuts if you think that represents a hundred!"

(You're going to love this one!!!)

The Ukranian leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each tree and says,
"A little dog came along and crap by each tree. So now you got dirty tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, and dirty tree and a turd, dat make one hundred. So, when do I start?"

***

After my short, but eventful stay in Scotland, I returned home to Oz.

I had a bunch of British pounds I needed to exchange, so I went to the currency exchange window at the local bank.

The line was short. Just one guy in front of me ... an Asian guy who was trying to exchange his yen for dollars.

He was a little irritated and asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla fo yen. Today I get hunat eighty. Why it change?"

The teller shrugged his shoulders and answered, "Fluctuations."

To which the Asian guy responded, "and fluc you white people, too!"

***

For centuries, Hindu women have worn a spot on their foreheads.

We have always naively thought that it had something to do with their religion.

The true story has recently been revealed by the Indian Embassy in Washington, D.C.

When these beautiful women get married, she brings with her, a dowry. On her wedding night, the husband scratches off the spot to see if he has won either a convenience store, a gas station, a donut shop or a motel in the United States.

Just thought you would like to know ...

***
An American couple is standing in an airport terminal somewhere in the States, waiting for their luggage. The wife happens to notice an oddly dressed man also waiting. She asks her husband where he thinks the man is from. The husband says he doesn't know.

He decides to ask the man and approaches him.
"Where are you from ?" he asks the man.
"Saskatoon , Saskatchewan " he replies.
Puzzled, the husband returns to his wife.
"Well, where is he from ?" asks the wife.
"I don't know" replies the husband. "He doesn't speak English."

Have a great weekend!
Happy Mother's Day to all Moms out there!

Theft Problem: Important Message

You might be afraid to go to sleep tonight after you read this.

You've heard about people who have been abducted and had their kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves.

My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few years ago. I went to sleep and woke up with someone else's thighs. It was just that quick. The replacements had the texture of cooked oatmeal. Whose thighs were these and what happened to mine? I spent the entire summer looking for my thighs. Finally, hurt and angry, I resigned myself to living out my life in jeans.. And then the thieves struck again.

My butt was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they took pains to match my new rear-end to the thighs they had stuck me with earlier. But my new butt was attached at least three inches lower than my original! I realized I'd have to give up my jeans in favor of long skirts.

Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I was fixing my hair and was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arm swing to and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This was really getting scary - my body was being replaced one section at a time. What could they do to me next?

When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey neck, I decided to tell my story. Women of the world, wake up and smell the coffee! Those 'plastic' surgeons are using REAL replacement body parts - stolen from you and me! The next time someone you know has something 'lifted', look again - was it lifted from you?

THIS IS NOT A HOAX. This is happening to women everywhere every night.

WARN YOUR FRIENDS!

P.S. Last year I thought some one had stolen my Boobs. I was lying in bed and they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I was relieved to see that they had just been hiding in my armpits as I slept. Now I keep them hidden in my waistband.

Recap, sort of...

Where do I start? It feels like ages since I really sat down and took some time to blog, to post something consistent… There are too many things going on and at the same time, nothing really worth posting about. Strange isn’t it?

Health wise, it’s the third morning in a row that I wake up pain free. This makes this blogger VERY happy. No headaches at all. It’s been months since that happened. I had six treatments of acupuncture, which helped, I can see the difference physically, plus last Sunday I started a steroids treatment for my constant migraine. It seems to be doing the trick. The main side effect to that last treatment is the fact that I’ve been “high” for the last five days, but hey, I feel no pain!

Work wise, I’ve been busy. Between my regular clients and starting a new one as well, added to the month-end joys. In between all this, I tried to ditch one, but that didn’t work. They decided to finally go for my recommendations and they’re still “on board”. Funny how some people only react when they have their backs against a wall. I don’t really enjoy doing that, pushing them against a wall that is, but it seemed necessary… Let’s see what the future hold…

Weather wise, it looks like Spring has sprung. Most of the snow is gone. I say most because there is still some left. But it’s not the nice fluffy kind, far from it. It’s all black and full of crap. It’s really disturbing to see those piles of detritus along the side of the road. In town it feels and looks like Spring, for sure. When I talk with my mom, who lives one-hour north on town, she still has feet of snow around her place.

Ever noticed how, as we age, we notice more the passage of time? I’ve realised that the other day, while gazing around during one of our drives. In a few weeks times nature took on a whole difference face. Only a few weeks ago all was white, and now tulips are popping out, buds everywhere, and within a few more weeks, maybe more like days, there will be leaves on the trees, and things around us will be green. And then we will forget how cold it was, and how much snow we’ve had to shovelled. When I think of this, I then realise that I am aging. I see time going by. I’m aware of it. It’s not a bad thing. Anyway, I don’t think it is.
___

Image: Passage

Your Friday Smile!

A stranger was seated next to a little girl on the airplane when the stranger turned to her and said, 'Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.'

The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said to the stranger, 'What would you like to talk about?'

'Oh, I don't know,' said the stranger. 'How about nuclear power?' and he smiles.

'OK, ' she said. 'That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass - . Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?'

The stranger, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, 'Hmmm, I have no idea.'
To which the little girl replies, 'Do you really feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know shit?'

***

One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife, “Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in Slim Fast. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!”

His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go unrewarded.

The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer.
“What the Hell is this?” he said to himself as a little 'dust' cloud appeared when he shook them out. “April,” he hollered into the bathroom, “why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?”

She replied with a snicker...'It's not talcum powder... It's 'Miracle Grow.''

Have a great weekend everyone!
Any birthday in May? Please do tell!